Womens-Place

The House is Too Quiet

Today I have a guest who is a fabulous writer and friend.  Her name is Deanna, but we all love to call her “Deek” she is an amazing woman, friend, mom and wife!  I am sure you will see her here a lot (especially if I have anything to do with it)  Below is her blog…please be encouraged to leave a comment below, it is quite simple to do!

The House is Too Quiet

I can remember the date; December 20, 1998. My husband rocked my world. The words he spoke were “Let’s adopt.” Life has never been the same.

My husband and I were married in 1985. In 1987 our son came along. He was a wonderful child and my son and I were and are incredibly close. We tried for additional children but none appeared. Would we spend the rest of our married lives as a single child household?

When our son turned the age of 12 I “freaked out”. Suddenly my house was too quiet. I mean really quiet. My husband worked afternoons or midnights and my son had the nerve to get a life and hang out with his friends. I found myself home alone all the time. I became obsessed with having a quiet and clean house. I didn’t want anyone to come visit as it could mess up my orderly and dull existence. I was becoming an old maid with a 12 year old son and a husband. Something major had to change. That was when my husband spoke those famous words. Our son was sure it would be a passing thought and that we would NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS follow through. I on the other hand had a new project to sink my teeth into and took on the task in earnest. I turned to my favorite source of outside information – the Internet.

I spent the next week on the Internet starting with www.precious.org. I filled out a questionnaire and based on my answers I found the country we were most suited for was Russia. This was wild! In our heads as we assumed our daughter(s) were in China. Who knows why? Just had a feeling. Soon after we were matched with an agency and the adoption whirlwind began. We were now at December 29, 1998.

At this time in our lives we learned what “leap of faith” truly meant. We were literally sending thousands of dollars to an agency that we could not see and had not even spoken to on the phone for an event that was going to change our life. We went on blind faith and crossed our fingers. What were we thinking? Zillions of emails and thousands of dollars later we finally got a real phone call telling us about our daughters. They were two and four and biological sisters. Did we feel they were ours? We knew practically nothing about them and had to make a decision within 12 hours. How crazy is that? We said yes.

We traveled to Russia on July 10, 1999. In less than seven months our “pregnancy” was complete and we had our daughters. The trip was amazing, confusing, terrifying, fun, exciting and life altering.

Our daughters have been with us now for almost 11 years. I would be a big fat liar if I said those were the most joyful and pleasant years ever. I would also lie if I said I didn’t occasionally question that long ago decision. Of course those moments are usually when there is a screaming match going on or I have yet another missing item of makeup, hair brush, bad grades, etc. But bottom line is these are definitely our daughters and it just took some extra time to figure where God put them and go get them.

Our son is now 23. Our daughters are 15, 12 and 8. People often give us that look. Trying to do the math. I will tell you honestly that my husband looks older than he is and I look younger. It is confusing. My husband likes to explain it by saying “same wife, bad planning.” Funny guy that one is. My son still likes to call it “the day we ruined his life”. He is funny too.

All good stories need to end on an amusing note. Ours does. When our daughters had been home for exactly one year I became pregnant. I know the exact day I became pregnant and I am telling you it was one year to the day that our daughters became ours. I figure that was God’s way of having the last laugh.